"Look, Mom! I'm smoking!"

Yeah. Not exactly what you want to hear from your 7-year old.

On one of the coldest days of the year, my adventurous daughter Lucci wanted to go play in the snow. Not wanting to squash her spirit, I reluctantly agreed to bundle up. (What is it about kids and sub-zero temperatures?! Oy.)

4 hours later (okay, it just felt like that), we were arctic-ready. I opened the door first, a gust of air hit both of our faces. "Are you sure, Lucci?" It was too late. She was out the door. Our dog, Jack, turned on his heels as if to say "Are you kidding me?!" It was clear: Lucci and I were on our own.

These moments, even in the middle of winter, are treasures for a mom. It's a chance to talk about everything and nothing. "Where do the squirrels go, Mom?" "Can we ice skate on the pool?" "This snow tastes good!" These are the kinds of heavy topics we cover. I love it. It's my chance to feel smart (she is only 7! The clock is ticking...my days are numbered as the "Wise One!")

I should say, it's USUALLY my chance to feel smart and have ALL the answers. "The squirrels hibernate, Dear." "We can't ice skate on the pool. Just because." "Snow is good. Just don't eat the yellow kind." Really high-brow stuff. Until this day. THIS day, I was completely NOT ready for what was headed my way.

"Look, Mom! I'm smoking!"

The image of my angel with two fingers holding an imaginary cigarette, drawing it up to her mouth and blowing "smoke" from her mouth, was enough to bring this gal to her knees. "WHY on EARTH would you DO that?" I glared. In retrospect, I didn't need to say anything. Apparently the look on my face (even limited through scarf and hat) was enough to make Lucci stop in her tracks. "I don't know. It just looks like smoke when I breathe."

Our walk ended early. I don't know if it was the numbness in my fingertips, or the leftover pang from what felt like a punch in the stomach. I don't mean to be melodramatic, but my husband is clear on this issue. Always has been. He's actually said, if I ever wanted a divorce (by the way, we've been together 23 years, happily married 19 of them!) all I would have to do, would be to light a cigarette and smoke it. As a kid, he describes living in a "bubble" of secondhand smoke. His mother, father and sister chain smoked. It had left it's mark. As an adult, he couldn't have the person he loved most, smoking. He's more forgiving of others, just not his wife.

Fortunately, for me, it's not a habit I adopted. And I've adopted a few. My parents both smoked when they were younger (1950's) and my mom was known to "sneak" a few until doctors thought they found a spot on her lung. Luckily, it was just enough to scare her straight. So far, that was it.

As for my in-laws, the story doesn't end as well. Both are gone now, cigarettes helped lead to my mother-in-law's death of cancer at the young age 52. My father-in-law lived until age 70. He stopped smoking one day. The day after doctors told him it WOULD kill him.

My walk with Lucci turned out to be a great opportunity. It didn't feel like it, but it was. Once inside our warm house, hot chocolate in hand, cooler heads prevailed. I explained my reaction to the imaginary cigarette. I didn't blame her for thinking it was fun to pretend to make smoke in the air. I just explained how cigarettes are really NOT funny. They can become the "boss of you" making you like them even though they're bad for you. (She hates it when her sister bosses her around!) Then it got more serious, just for a minute. "Cigarettes are so bad for you, they can kill you...that smoke, is poison inside you. It turns your lungs black, not the pretty pink they are right now (she loves pink!).

I'm pretty sure she heard me. She didn't ask any questions, but sipped thoughtfully on her "coffee." It wasn't until a few days later that I knew she really was paying attention.

After talking her sister into the sub-zero play date, I noticed her waving her arms explaining something. Turns out, she told her, "Smoking can kill you!"

Carla Davis tells her story

Carla Davis - in the Mix Studio

Thank you Carla Davis of 96.5 WMT FM for sharing your thoughts on dealing with Tobacco Advertising! 


I am 44 years old and never even taken a puff of a cigarette, and quite proud of that!

I know why I never even considered smoking....because when I was in elementary school a man with throat cancer came to my school and spoke from the hole in his throat into a microphone. That scared me. Never once have I been tempted.

I am now a mom of 2 teenage girls who also have never taken a puff, which pleases me!

Carla's beautiful (non-smoking) girls!

How do they know of the dangers of smoking? They have learned a little about it from me, and their school but mostly from ASAC who came to our Girl Scout meeting and had lots of examples of what happens when you smoke. A lot of disgusting things!

Who is this targeting? Not adults! 

What would I do if I saw a cigarette advertisement hanging in my daughter's room? I would talk to her and tell her how it looks like she is endorsing we all feel strongly against. I am sure she would understand and if she would insist I would offer an alternative item to hang on her wall with a positive theme!

Great example of "smoker's teeth" 

Show your kids what happens to their teeth and tell them that kissing a smoker is like kissing an ashtray!

Visuals are great!

I recall leaving the hospital after giving birth to my oldest daughter and her very first breath outside was that of a cloud of smoke from people smoking outside the exit of the hospital. That irritated me! It irritates my kids too, so much that they feel confident to make comments to those smoking in their presence. We feel everyone can make their own choices , but once your bad choices interfere in our world...something needs to be done. 


Carla Davis, mother of two (non-smoking!) girls 




Special thanks to Carla for sharing her thoughts with us! 

“The S Word”: One Mom’s Approach to Taking on Smoking

I’ll admit it. I’m a goodie-goodie. I’ve always been a rule follower and someone who plays it safe. So, the fact that I have never once put a cigarette in my mouth won’t surprise anyone who knows me. It also doesn’t exactly give me a lot of credibility in the experience department.

It hasn’t been so long that we’ve been a smoke-free state that I can’t remember being immersed in my fair share of smoke. But, I never once had interest in trying a cigarette after having it around me. In fact, to the contrary, I have always been turned off by smoking. Now, I realize that it’s highly unlikely that both of my daughters – now 2 and 6 - will have the same experience. In fact, several people whom I love dearly have been on-again, off-again smokers to this day. Odds are that my girls will want to give it a try at some point.

What DO I know about smoking in my limited experience? It’s illegal to purchase cigarettes under the age of eighteen. After that, those mysterious sticks become fair game. So, I’ve got the law on my side for 12 more years (rule follower, remember?), but what about after that? Worse yet, what if my girls are not the rule-following goodie-goodie (gasp!) that their mother was? What if they don’t only disobey my rules, but they also disobey the law?! (It happens, you know.) Enter panic.

Breathing resumed (this non-smoker can do that with ease), it appears to me that, at age 6, the message that smoking is harmful is out there. My eldest daughter generally seems to hold the basic opinion that smoking equals bad. Between school, kids’ TV programming, and the message and modeling from home, that much seems understood. But, what about when she sees my best friend smoke? Or smells it on a beloved relative? This brings me to the point I’ve found myself wanting to make most to my kids at this particular age: Smoking = Bad, but People Who Smoke ≠ Bad. The two often become one-in-the-same.

It might seem unlikely, but I find that knowing and loving people who smoke will be an advantage in my discussion of “the S word” with my kids. While I’m modeling with the choice not to smoke, our dear friends and family are lending the credible experience to my case that this is one experiment they ought to pass up. Because the friends and family we love are intelligent, kind, ambitious and have great values. But, they tried cigarettes for one reason or another. And now they can’t stop. They desperately want to. They’ve made repeated attempts to cease. But, they have failed to kick cigarettes out their doors once and for all. And they hate it.

I intend to tell my kids about how our friends started out enjoying the feeling they got from smoking, but in time, realized it was a mistake. It is proven to cause harm to your body. It’s irritating and harmful to the non-smokers you subject to your second-hand smoke. It’s expensive – from the cost of the cigarettes themselves to increased health insurance premiums. Smoking just plain stinks. But, most of all, it’s addicting. And if you change your mind about smoking later, it can be nearly impossible to stop. That’s not a risk worth taking.

It’s funny – so many of us swear we’ll never dole out the parental propaganda that our parents once did. But, here I am finding the wisdom in what my parents repeatedly told me: “It’s OK to make mistakes. Mistakes can be great. Just make sure that the mistakes you make aren’t going to change your life permanently. Make sure your mistakes are correctable.” From my perspective, smoking is one mistake that has a darn good chance of being life-changing. I’ve lived enough to see a lot of wonderful people unable to correct theirs. You know what seems like a lot less hassle? Not starting what you can’t stop. But, then, whoever liked listening to what a goodie-goodie had to say?

How to keep your child from being a victim of Big Tobacco's marketing

Tobacco ads are everywhere.

Although it is important to me that we do everything in our power to keep Tobacco Companies from marketing directly to kids, I know that they are exposed to multiple forms of advertising every single day.

As a mom, it's my job to teach them how to deal with the barrage of tobacco advertising aimed right at their eye level. And it is, most definitely targeting kids. It has been proven time and time again that Big Tobacco Targets our Kids. Research firms, lawyers and advocacy groups have done the research (The Verdict is In: Marketing to Youth) and have proven without a doubt that tobacco companies market very specifically toward youth. And not just at-risk youth. GIS maps from Linn County Public Health show high levels of concentrations in middle class and upper middle class neighborhoods, surrounding schools and youth programs. Check out your Linn County School and see how many ads your child can be exposed to on a daily basis. Why? Middle and upper middle class kids have more discretionary income. And where there's a will, there's a way.

Why are they doing this? Audience recruitment of course. In order to keep the money flowing they need newly addicted customers. And they make it easier and more appealing than ever - producing tobacco related products that are twice as addicting, just as devastatingly dangerous and now look and taste like candy. Tell me that isn't targeted at youth who have been told all about the evils of smoking.

When I see tobacco ads - and I don't mean just cigarettes - at my child's height, or portraying tobacco use as a hip and cool part of youth culture, I call it out. We talk about what ads are trying to get you to do all the time (the downside of being a marketing chick's daughter) and this is no exception.

Ask your kids these questions:

What is this ad trying to get you to do? Smoke cigarettes. Chew Tobacco.

Why do they want you to smoke or chew? To get you addicted to their products so they can make money from it.

Why do they try to get kids to buy it? So they can make money off you for a long time because it's so hard to quit.

Here's what I don't do:

1. Pretend I didn't see it

2. Hope they didn't see it

3. Assume they do not know, absorb or understand what the advertisement is about.

Kids are sponges, they absorb everything around them, and they are very susceptible to advertising. Big Tobacco has the money to infiltrate your child's line of vision. While agencies like Linn County Public Health work to restrict this advertising, don't neglect the conversation that needs to happen around these advertisements - and other potentially harmful behaviors. And don't forget, those Tobacco Companies have millions to lose as generations of smokers die of smoking-related illnesses. That's why they are getting innovative about their products.

Help your children to not become a victim of Big Tobacco's marketing. Arm them with knowledge and join the movement to restrict their advertising.

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